"Your value does not decrease based on someone's inability to see your worth."
Today, I was at work and someone hinted at the fact that they thought I was ugly. My mind suddenly went back to all of those years where people called me ugly in school. I immediately felt extremely insecure, and I wanted to make myself feel as small as possible. I contemplated whether or not I should wear more makeup. Because makeup makes you prettier, right? Should I lose weight because skinnier people are pretty people, right? Should I change how I dress because the less clothing the better..right?
I began to think my worth in a matter of minutes. I felt worthless in a matter of seconds. Then I remembered a therapy session I had in which my therapist asked me where my worth lies. "What determines your worth"? she asked me. Of course I started to count off many superficial things that I thought defined my worth. She proceeded to ask me, "What if you lost all of those things today"? That caught me off guard. For so many years I had put my worth in things that could be lost in a split second. That day she challenged me to put my worth in things that cannot be changed (i.e. God, my personality, etc). That way if something happens to the superficial things that I named, I would still stand strong, unshaken because I knew my worth was in something that nothing, or no one, could take away from me.
So in my mind, I started to name things that I knew defined my worth. Things that were concrete. What I have to remind myself every single day is that I define my worth. No one else has the right to tell me my worth. I didn't name what I chose to find my worth in because I don't want to influence you all in how you choose your worth but what I can say is this, you are worth so much more than you think. My worth will not be defined by someone else. My worth will not be defined by the superficial things of this world. My worth will not be defined by the clothes I wear, or things I do. My worth will be defined by who I am. I will define my worth. Not you.
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